The quality of my days is slowly changing.
Rising of a morning so much earlier that I have done in my last 41 years, I see the subtle shifts in light and shadow. This is that very moment when the sun begins casting light between the apartments, lays bright strips between trees and bushes living along the sidewalks. These visuals are occurring later each day.
Why am I awake before 7am? I guess because I’m changing too. I’m starting to go to bed earlier. Eating dinner earlier and eating less.
I had to do something. The world, my family, social life, my body, all are changing without my permission. And practical things are changing, like prices of food, clothes, etc, my email address (I’ll tell you that one at the end of the newsletter), my five-year-old phone, the Comcast hookup, my investments, my friends, …..
I decided I wanted to be the author of one of my own changes. Put my foot forward in a new-to-me way. Getting to bed earlier and rising earlier is changing my perspective of life. I like it. Inspiration hit and I rearranged my bedroom. Then another descended over my psyche, and I put the easel up in the living room and started a painting project. Then I gained the creative distance I needed and regarded my mess of a third novel and now I’m changing that too.
Chaos is all around us. The turmoil and confusion of life may never change. I am grateful I’ve found a way at least to feel as if I have a little control over small sections of my own life. Small spaces where something is totally up to me.